Friday, February 09, 2007

Goth princess

For Christmas, Bede gave me the Playmobil goth queen:

The description of the dolly was "evil queen," but since when did a penchant for wearing black and gold with heavy eye-makeup make a person "evil?" Silly, woozy marketers. The dolly was obviously a goth queen. As Lucia introduced Esmeralda to the other dollies, she said, "The goth queen walks in the night." How did she know? The child is uncanny.

This rare, discontinued Playmobil dolly is now on my wishlist:

This dolly is billed as a "witch." How many witches do you know (even stereotypical ones) wear hennins? Again, the marketers are addled. As we established earlier, hennins are now known as fashion accessories for fairy tale princesses. Ergo, this dolly is a goth princess. Esmeralda is probably the auntie of the goth princess, not the mother. Think about it: If the goth princess' mother were a goth queen, the princess would probably rebel by dressing in shirts with Peter Pan collars and wearing sensible shoes.

You might wonder why the goth princess has a "fillet of a fenny snake" in her hand if she's not a stereotypical witch brewing amphibious/reptilian stew? I'm glad you asked. Remember in the book of Exodus, when Aaron, brother of Moses, threw down a staff in front of Pharoah? Remember that the staff turned into a serpent?

Somehow, there's a connection.


Yorkshire Pudding said...

I would like to see a mud wrestling match between the goth queen and thw witch. Obviously this would entail them disrobing beforehand. Spookily, their faces seem almost identical in every way!

Steff said...

Ooh I love them I want one

Alkelda the Gleeful said...

YP: I think you like to talk about mud-wrestling more than you actually like to watch it! Think about it. It's mud. Now, if you had said that you wanted to see the goth queen and the goth princess take part in a gardening match to see who could plant the most pumpkins, then I could understand a bit more. Digging in the dirt is more fun than wrestling in the mud... or so I've been told.

Steff: The goth queen (Playmobil #4591) is showing up on eBay quite a bit these days. The goth princess (Playmobil #4530) is a lot harder to find.

Lone Star Ma said...

Wow. Playmobil is COOL.

BlueMamma said...

Have you seen the playmobil romani circus?

Alkelda the Gleeful said...

BlueMamma: I surely have! I must resist. Must.